Beautiful Uncertainty...

Monday, March 29, 2010

Out of the Dark....

I'm burned out and wasted

I'm tired of pacing

I'm busy erasing voices of the dead

Everything changes

And everyone's faceless

I wanna replace this darkness in my head

In a strange strange place, I'm lying on the edge of a star

In these violent days, I only wanna be where you are

Even fools they say... can find a way out of the dark

Of the dark

Help me out of the dark

Have I been a sinner?

A lover, a killer?

Cause the world I've discovered

It feels nothing like my heart

I wanna escape it

Or try to embrace it

I keep re-arranging everything I know

In a strange strange place, I'm lying on the edge of a star

In these violent days, I only wanna be where you are

Even fools they say... can find a way out of the dark

Of the dark

Help me out of the dark

Out... of the dark

Help me out of the dark

 - Matt Hires - 

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Snow in England

This is the street outside my home, covered in white...

Footsteps in the snow...

Recreation park two minutes from my home...

I built my first snowman in my's hard work!

He is a friendly one :)

Thursday, November 12, 2009


Yep, back there! Woo hoo!! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!
Yes, I am quite happy. First, I am working again. After a very loooonngg time. Second, it is oh so christmassy at Starbucks and everywhere now, so it's such a good time to be back.

When I went to Whitgift Centre which is like a mall in the middle of town, I was jumping up and down and hugging Sarah and Fahid who was working on Tuesday. So us three did the screamy huggy thingy. I haven't seen them for ages and it is really touching to be back. Then the new manager showed up, his name - Fabio I think. He was talking with some new girl.

Then I realised that most of the people there that I know have gone, after I left they all followed suit not long after. Ian, the manager has resigned, Basia is on leave, Aneta's also resigned and gone back to Poland, Nora's gone to a Clapham store, Diana's now manager in another store. That leaves Fahid, Sarah and Michael that I know there really. After Fahid's shift, he came out of the store solemnly and told me that Fabio has hired that girl, and that's the last he's taking in. As much as Fahid and Sarah had asked for me instead of that other person, the new manager didn't want to change his mind, so too bad I was literally bout an hour late? Fahid did say he had booked me a spot with Ian (the previous manager) ever since I texted him about a month ago, and Ian had told Fabio, but no pulling strings with this new manager. Or maybe he didn't like that I did the screamy huggy thingy with Sarah and Fahid while they were working. Darn...

Fahid didn't give up though. He mentioned Diana is manager now, but I didn't realise that she was just in Centrale which is like two minutes from my old store, and I used to help out there when it was super busy last year during Christmas as well. He said, don't have high hopes as he doesn't know if Diana has finished hiring for the season. She might have. But he walked with me, the moment we got to Centrale, we did another round of screamy huggy thingy. Zuzanna spotted me first and she screamed. Diana was on the phone and did not see me. Later when she finished and turned around, she went like.... "OMG, look who's here. Where have you gone?" Before she said anything else, we were doing the screamy huggy. And then Zuzana said while pointing to a stack of other applications. "I don't want the others. I want her". Fahid looked at me, I looked at Fahid. We looked at Diana, she said she's only hiring for now till Christmas. I nodded my head so hard, Zuzanna nodded so enthusiastically as well. I couldn't help grinning from ear to ear. I guess I just got hired then and there!:) Yayyy!!!

Heaps of paperwork to do, from scratch. It's like doing homework all over again. I took the entire evening completing two books. And the following day, another hour and a half in the store with Diana going through fire quizzes, contracts, till operation agreements etc. And I now officially have a new partner number, and start work Saturday:)

It's not a big deal, and I know I'm going to have to work my ass off again. But it is better than having nothing:)

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

How to make Chinese Chicken Rice

Yesterday I made some kick-ass Chinese chicken rice. And you know how I like food. I wouldn't say kick-ass, unless it is. It was my first try. Experimental. But it was GooooooooooD. I know you guys don't cook back there. But whoever wants to try... here's how to do it!:)


Jasmine rice:)
2 x red onions
5 x cloves garlic
4-6 com ginger
2 x large knobs of butter
Depending on how many you are cooking for:
2 x pieces chicken legs/thighs
Sesame oil
Light soya sauce
Dark soya sauce
Chilli garlic sauce
Lime zest and juice


1) Chop onions, garlic and ginger. Fry till slightly brown and fragrant. Prepare food processor. Put 1 x small cup of water into the blender, then the onions, garlic and ginger. Blitz till you get a smooth paste.

2) Wash and boil rice. Add the onion, garlic and ginger mix into the water and wait for water to boil. Then add two large knobs of butter and mix well into the water and rice. Add a little salt if you like. Lower heat and simmer until rice is cooked. Voila, the very nice and fragrant rice is ready!

3) Season the chicken pieces with lots of sesame oil, a little salt, and light soya sauce. Wrap with foil and cook in oven until chicken is not red inside. When you open the foil wrap, there should be lots of chicken juices. Keep the juice and just take the chicken out and chop and arrange on top of rice.

4) Add lime zest and juice to garlic chilli sauce. Add a drop of sesame oil and about 3 x tablespoons of the chicken juices to the dark soya sauce. Mix well. Drizzle dark soya sauce mix onto chicken and rice just before serving.

5) Serve with slices of cucumber on the side, and some coriander on the chicken.

Easy peasy lemon squeezy. This was inspired by a Malaysian restaurant in Croydon. Now I can make my own, I don't have to pay £6 for a plate of chicken rice no more:)

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Can't stop moaning...

One who is busy with work has less time to moan about life. Unfortunately, I am at the stage of unemployment and hating it, so yes... plenty of time to moan about my life. Here are some of my petty petty moanings:

1) I think the house is pretty clean. Toilets, bathroom, kitchen etc. However my housemate insists that DEEP CLEANING needs to be done every week. How DEEP can you go about cleaning? And on his off days you will hear him scrub the toilets and bathroom for hours (yes, hours) and they are very small only. So I don't know how deep he went. And seriously, if I wasn't home I don't really care. But now being at home and hearing him go on and on in the bathroom, really gets on my nerves and stresses me out. Plus, I think he does it extra loud so I can hear him and get the hint and DO IT. But I don't know how to DO IT. Cos there is nothing to do!

2) Jobs. I know there are jobs out there. Yes, cleaner jobs, babysitting perhaps. Ironing even. But I really just want to have a proper job. Beggars can't be choosers I know. But I have been working on my cvs and reel etc to send out. So no, I'm not just bumming around at home. Even so, it does get annoying whenever we walk past a shop window and "Oh, Jasmine that one needs a cleaner. Go for it!". I know I should, I just fail to embrace the opportunity. And lately, a friend has recommended me a job in Hull. That is super far away from where I am. It is a waitressing job, food and accommodation provided for in a chinese restaurant. 10 hours work a day, 6 days a week. I would consider the job, and was actually thinking about it, but the friend later called to tell me I asked the restaurant manager too many questions. And that I embarassed her, and told me to forget about the job. I was like ???? Huh? What did I even do? I just wanted to find out details before packing my bags, go far far away and staying in goodness knows where and working for don't know who. Apparently, by asking basic questions, I have attitude problems. Sigh.

3) In denial. Most people are. The say everything is all going to be all right. Just don't think about it, it will all turn out well. How is it that when you don't plan things are going to turn out just all right for you? Perhaps you could be lucky. But more often than not, work is involved to make sure your boat is steering the right way. Again, I have so much time on my hands at the moment, I am thinking a lot about the future. Oh I am steering the boat all right, but I do need some guidance, help etc. I just don't know where to go. What to do. I've been doing lots. But the boat has stayed in one place. And yes, when the boat don't move, the fat dont' go anywhere. So the shanks and handles have been building up quite well. Muffin tops and dangly bingo wings. Ah, all the amount of yoga. And still looking like a ball, which cannot roll. Can you imagine how frustrating that is?

4) Being mistaken to be Thai. The amount of times people come up to me greeting me in Thai is uncountable now. Seriously. Whether they are English trying to be funny, or genuine Thais in this country thinking I am one of them. I am not saying I am better, please do not insult me for being Thai. I am saying, please check before you greet. It is terribly irritating and I feel like a record player saying "Sorry, I'm not Thai, I don't understand." Then smile widely, and they carry on speaking Thai to you. ??? Why?

Ah well, that is me, moaning. About little petty things in life. My life is not too bad. I've just been to Ireland and back. It's been an overall good trip. Have pictures to post, but will do so early next week as I don't have a camera, so the photos aren't with me. Moan moan moan...

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Oxted Pram Race 2009

Early this month, I participated in what I would think the most outrageous race I have ever been in my life. Well, I suppose it is not so unusual in England, but for me costumes and dress-ups are not normally my kind of thing. We saw the poster advertising the race one fine Friday afternoon. I laughed at it and said "What?? Prammmssss?" Then Andy asked if I was interested to join the Oxted Pram Race 2009, my first thought was "No wayyyyyyyy", then seconds later I thought "Ah well, I might not be here this time next year, so this might be my once in a lifetime being ridiculous. Plus no one here knows me anyway. Might as well. Okay!"

Before I knew it, we were discussing a team name while having a beer, and I was appointed team leader. Yeay! Team name - The AWE PAIRS!!!:)

I told myself I was NOT going in costume, but then later Andy found pictures of previous year's races, and omg everyone has gone all out for costumes and building amazing prams. So I agreed to go in costume, but a rather safe one:) Not Andy though.

It was great atmosphere during the race day. Everyone was dressed up walking in a big field. You name it, they have it. Batman, Legoman, Smurfs, Wimbledon Tennis players, policemen, firemen, prisoners, nuns, cavemen etc. Andy's friend, Bill let us borrow Ben and Sue's old pram. It was a baby pram, but surprisingly we fit in it. Heh. Oxted looked like a small village, but the amount of people that turned up was astounding. Lots of families, lots of children with water guns. It didn't look thaaaaaaat many at first, but once the race started, and the children started firing, we all got soaked in no time.

There were 7 stops, some pubs, a cricket club. At each stop we were to drink 1/2 a pint of beer then swap places. Andy started off first. By the 4th stop, we were both feeling really sick. Running and drinking beer REALLY does not go together. Especially the last bit of the race was an uphill run. We just stopped and standing there with beers in our hand, panting away, soaked and we couldn't carry on. A man came up to us shouting "Oi, in case you haven't noticed, it's a race!!!!!!" All right, all right.. sick as we felt we downed the alcohol and moved on.

Here's a video of the pram race. Can you spot us? Hint, I got stuck and had to swap. Hehe. We came in 64th place out of 84 teams. Not bad for a first time?

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Rag Doll